February 27, 2018
Incest is insidious and pervasive.
It doesn’t receive the attention or the air time, that goes into campaigns to stop unhealthy behaviour, such as smoking.
There’s no groundswell to educate and prevent or stop incest.
Incest happens all the time, every day, creating harm and extreme damage to the family as well as the community.
I know of no campaign to stop incest, to educate children on what actions to take if it happens, or to report it safely.
That “stranger danger” is BS when it comes to incest, to being violated by those who are supposed to protect and love.
Incest’s never ending harm needs to be hammered home.
Some of us recover, but we remember, and are affected for life. Incest’s damage can be crippling when trying to recover.
So who helps the millions victimized mostly by men?
How do we help our kids avoid harm, be protected, have an avenue to help?
How do we set up a “help” system that deals with researching complaints, and save, help, survivors, young and old, recover from the failings of society.
How do we as a whole protect our children?
The family unit is protected by our culture with the old belief that family issues belong within the family.
Secrets are life threatening, dating back to when men ruled the world house, women were property, couldn’t vote, own property, inherit from spouses.
That wasn’t long ago.
Children need to understand incest and have a safe place to talk to someone.
Some may be worried of false accusations by children or older angry juveniles attempts to get back at parents for whatever reasons.
How do we have a national conversation about something so taboo?
We don’t want a witch hunt but how about bringing it out of the closet?
I have listened to horrible tales of survivors of torture, of incest, of being used in porn films as a child, ritual abuse, etc.
But, the majority of perpetrators are men. Yes, there are women perps too.
How do you have a national conversation when there are so many abusing their children?
How do you protect the victims while exposing the perpetrators?
How do you expose the perpetrators?
How do you start a national conversation?
How do you stop the epidemic?
I believe many need to be cognizant of the harm done to incest survivors.
Society needs to be more aware, more ready to listen to kids.
Kids will feel safe telling someone if incest comes out of the shadows; the “secret EXPOSED”
EXPOSE THE SECRET
When there is a widespread disease in the fabric of our communities, in our families — the place that should be safe and nurturing — it must be removed carefully so as to protect the victims.
But it must be exposed and smashed.
The fact that incest is life destroying and a taboo needs to be hammered home through PSA’s (Public Service Announcements).
There needs to be enough mental health workers to help the families and/or victims quickly.
It needs to be a movement like #neveragain.
It needs to be talked about in small groups in school.
Speakers need to talk to kids about what it is and what to do if it is happening to you.
How do we protect the children from dangerous perpetrators while we are blowing up the systematic destruction of lives, which is incest?
Is it grass roots or top down?
I am a survivor of others’ needs to satisfy their perversion.
It pretty much destroyed any hope for a healthy childhood or young adulthood.
I have spent my life recovering. A decade on disability in my 30’s while I worked for cash in two businesses I started, as a house cleaner, and a pet sitter as I “re-trained” — thank you government — as a massage therapist in a 500 hour program as I continued therapy.
Next, I went to junior college in a program for working adults while being a massage therapist, and for 7 months only, my teenage daughter lived with me. That didn’t work so well.
My nights were filled with fear of footsteps. I held my breath, I didn’t move with eyes closed tight holding very still. Sometimes he would expose himself to me standing drunk at the door. One time he knocked over an aquarium with my gerbils in it. Mom slept through the crash, their bedroom just below mine.
I was never out of danger. Constant vigilance was my way of life. I was angry, defensive and hyper vigilant.
Abused, but having a mother who wouldn’t listen to me, literally screaming at her that I hated Fred. Never was I asked why.
I told no one except one friend. I showed her Fred’s pornography collection.
Photos, leering, spying, entrapment, confinement, forced contact — nowhere was safe — home, car, hotels on vacation.
How many children are acting out due to being sexually abused?
Maybe we start with educating students on the norms of society and the very prevalent deviant population of mainly men that harm women and girls and babies. We are treated like slaves at home.
This has to stop and there needs to be a spotlight on it now.
You say there are programs in school? Where is the proof they are stopping children from being victims of incest?