On the weekend, I burned a pot on the stove.
The firemen came, the whole building was evacuated – I wasn’t here – it was mayhem, I heard.
At first I was quite balanced, no panic on the drive home when one of the tenants phoned and said there was a lot of smoke coming out of my apartment, a feeling of calm, an eerie numbness.
The next days, sitting in the smell of smoke with a busted door, the doubt started to creep in, and the question: “Why did this happen?”
In the last 10 years I’ve come to see there are no accidents around me.
It took a few days before I realized this was a metaphor for lifetimes connected to disarray.
On Tuesdays, I’m doing a workshop with my friend, Lee, in Florida – it’s mostly Jewish ladies I see on Zoom – and the pot burnt on Sunday.
The Tuesday class after the pot burns I don’t talk about it.
It was a class about communication with our guides and I’m thinking, “That was an example of not communicating with my guides – forgetting my pot was on the stove — how does that relate to this class?”
Next class I will extend an apology. . . I feel I should extend one here, too.
“If I ‘burned’ you in a lifetime, on or off planet, I Am So Sorry. I extend my deepest apologies to you.”
In my building I put notes in the 2 elevators saying I was really sorry for all the disarray — that I had not turned off the stove on my way out the door and my pot burnt — that I was so sorry.
That led to worry. . . about comments. What were people going to write on my note. I didn’t want to leave my apartment. I fell out of balance. Then I made myself to go to work. . . and I talked about the burning pot at work. . .
On my return from work, there were some notes in the elevator from tenants, telling me not to worry. One even said that nothing ever happens in our building, and it created excitement, everyone together outside.
But I am here to apologize. . . for lifetimes of disarray. . . for doing things not in right alignment. . .
The physics — as within so without — if I hang onto “no apology to self/others” that stays on planet in the interconnectedness of everything and I hinder the Love and peace movement.
I apologize
for ‘the burnt pot’
for lifetimes of disarray.
I extend my deep apologies,
I’m so sorry.
